idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize