just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Randomize
