I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
