Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
