he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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