dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
