drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
We need to rekindle our bromance
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
