CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
