just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
