sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
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