Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
