I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Randomize
