Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  I woke up on my floor...

  (1-516): View more from New York

  I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...

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  (516): I woke up on my floor... (1-516): I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop... http://tfl.nu/u1o5
  Replies (12) Good night (3900) Bad night (712)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order

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  (847): then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order http://tfl.nu/len1
  Replies (11) Good night (877) Bad night (5449)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.

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  (330): just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this. http://tfl.nu/6gzz
  Replies (10) Good night (5939) Bad night (957)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.

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  (+44): If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong. http://tfl.nu/d9uh
  Replies (26) Good night (944) Bad night (6276)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend

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  (940): he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend http://tfl.nu/ls1q
  Replies (11) Good night (817) Bad night (3451)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Blood and glitter go together right?

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  (407): Blood and glitter go together right? http://tfl.nu/jbni
  Replies (9) Good night (1445) Bad night (799)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great

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  (978): It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great http://tfl.nu/o9gd
  Replies (6) Good night (2320) Bad night (564)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant

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  (248): she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant http://tfl.nu/st8i
  Replies (2) Good night (453) Bad night (1419)
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  (716): View more from New York

  He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.

  (585): View more from New York

  Find him and marry him.

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  (716): He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night. (585): Find him and marry him. http://tfl.nu/d6kn
  Replies (5) Good night (2314) Bad night (573)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.

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  (570): He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF. http://tfl.nu/a7gm
  Replies (7) Good night (385) Bad night (1266)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.

  (1-816): View more from Missouri

  I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.

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  (816): I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week. (1-816): I think we all know your liver needs a man's name. http://tfl.nu/bufv
  Replies (7) Good night (1023) Bad night (319)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.

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  (215): Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you. http://tfl.nu/su7n
  Replies (12) Good night (3040) Bad night (498)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?

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  (785): Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird? http://tfl.nu/9vh0
  Replies (8) Good night (1329) Bad night (569)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.

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  (804): The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me. http://tfl.nu/s0vs
  Replies (1) Good night (524) Bad night (227)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.

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  (954): I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller. http://tfl.nu/ozku
  Replies (2) Good night (699) Bad night (167)

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