i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
