..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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