you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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