So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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