you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
