she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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