He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
