I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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