That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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