i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
