next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Green mimosas i think yes
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
