Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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