It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
