I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize