so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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