I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Randomize