I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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