piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
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