what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
