Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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