I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
