Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
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Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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