we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
