I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
