everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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