it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
We got so high we made milksteak
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
