Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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