this beer tastes like vomit already
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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