i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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