And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
She bit a glass in half.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
you never un-have a 4some
Randomize
