alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
