another moral hangover. fuck.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
