Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
