His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize