In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
