Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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