You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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